Domestic Violence

Ways Your Partner May Have Hurt You

Domestic Violence is a very serious concern.  An action for a Civil Domestic Violence Civil Protection Order (CPO) or protection against menacing by stalking (CSPO) can be filed if you meet certain requirements.  Protected persons can include family or household members.

Attorney Melissa Graham-Hurd has experience in representing battered partners, as well as those accused of being violent.  In order to assist her in meeting your needs, please read each set of questions and circle yes or no to each question, and bring this worksheet with you when you meet with me so we can discuss your answers and decide the appropriate course of conduct.

HAS YOUR PARTNER EVER:

   
Called you a name or made fun of you? YES NO
Ignored you? YES NO
Told you that you were a bad parent? YES NO
Refused to do housework or childcare? YES NO
Made you ask for permission to use personal property? YES NO
Accused you of paying to much attention to someone or something else? YES NO
Made you beg for forgiveness? YES NO
Demand to be waited upon? YES NO
Intimidated you through his tone of voice? YES NO
Gave you angry looks or stares? YES NO
Put down your family or friends? YES NO
Put down your physical appearance? YES NO
Tried to change your physical appearance? YES NO
Not taken advantage of any of your strengths or accomplishments? YES NO
Told you that no one else would want you? YES NO
Accused you of cheating on the relationship? YES NO
Harassed you for information on past relationships? YES NO
Put down or yelled at your children in front of you? YES NO
Threatened to physically take your children away? YES NO
Threatened to make you lose custody of the children? YES NO

 

CONFINEMENT AND CONTROL ISSUES:

The following items have to do with incidents in which your partner may have attempted or succeeded in confining you to your home or controlling whom you saw or spoke to.

HAS YOUR PARTNER EVER:

   
Bodily confined or held you against your will? YES NO
Prevented you from leaving a room or your home? YES NO
Stopped you from going to school or work? YES NO
Prevented you from seeing family or friends? YES NO
Denied you the right to receive health care? YES NO
Prevented you from taking any medications? YES NO
Listened to your phone calls? YES NO
Disabled your phone? YES NO
Opened your mail? YES NO
Had you followed? YES NO
Checked the mileage on your car? YES NO
Taken away your keys? YES NO
Phoned you repeatedly at work? YES NO
Got you fired from work? YES NO
Controlled your food intake? YES NO
Put you on a monetary allowance? YES NO
Made you ask or beg for money? YES NO
Made you explain how money was spent? YES NO
Got angry if you were late getting home? YES NO
Insisted on having the final say in all decisions? YES NO
Made you use drugs or alcohol against your will? YES NO

 

THREAT OF PHYSICAL VIOLENCE

The following items have to do with behavior your partner may have used to threaten or scare you.

HAS YOUR PARTNER EVER:

   
Threatened to hit you? YES NO
Threatened to throw objects at you? YES NO
Threatened to use a weapon against you? YES NO
Threatened to kill you? YES NO
Thrown or smashed objects in your presence? YES NO
Destroyed your personal property? YES NO
Hit walls or pounded a fist when angry at you? YES NO
Driven carelessly when you were in the car? YES NO
Abused family pets to hurt you? YES NO
Punished your children when he/she was angry at you? YES NO
Threatened to harm or kill your family and/or friends? YES NO
Threatened to harm or kill your children? YES NO
Threatened to harm or kill himself/herself? YES NO
Hurt or mutilated himself/herself to scare you? YES NO
Tried to run you over with a vehicle? YES NO

 

PHYSICAL VIOLENCE

The following items have to do with incidents in which physical violence may have occurred against you.

HAS YOUR PARTNER EVER:

   
Slapped you? YES NO
Pushed or shoved you? YES NO
Thrown you around (into walls, furniture, onto floors)? YES NO
Hit you with an open hand? YES NO
Hit you with a fist? YES NO
Hit you with an object? YES NO
Scratched you? YES NO
Pinched you? YES NO
Pulled your hair? YES NO
Grabbed you? YES NO
Spit on you? YES NO
Bit you? YES NO
Kicked you? YES NO
Burned you? YES NO
Injured you by holding or squeezing you too tightly? YES NO
Choked or tried to strangle you? YES NO
Used a weapon against you (stabbed, shot, etc.)? YES NO
Run you over with a vehicle? YES NO
Physically hurt you while you were pregnant? YES NO
Physically hurt you while he/she was under the influence of alcohol or drugs? YES NO

 

SEXUAL ABUSE

The following items are concerned with sexual abuse.  Many women do not realize sexual abuse has occurred during their relationships until someone points out specific things that can happen between men and women that are physically and/or emotionally harmful to women.

HAS YOUR PARTNER EVER:

   
Called you negative sexual names like “frigid” or “whore”? YES NO
Forced or pressured you to participate in sex with him against your will? YES NO
Pressured you to participate in a sexual activity that hurt you? YES NO
Forced you to have sex in the presence of others? YES NO
Used threatening objects or weapons during sex? YES NO
Prevented you from using birth control? YES NO
Lied about his use of birth control? YES NO
Withheld information about whether he had been exposed to a sexually transmitted   disease or the HIV virus? YES NO
Physically attacked the sexual parts of your body (breasts or genitalia)? YES NO
Pressured you to get pregnant against your will? YES NO

THIS INFORMATION IS INTENDED TO BE A BRIEF OVERVIEW OF CIVIL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND IS NOT INTENDED AS LEGAL ADVICE ON YOUR PARTICULAR CIRCUMSTANCES.  IT IS ONLY INTENDED TO ASSIST YOU IN UNDERSTANDING THE PROCESS. 

IF YOU SHOULD HAVE ANY QUESTIONS, PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE TO CONTACT THE OFFICE TO SCHEDULE AN APPOINTMENT – 330-996-4099.